Eligibility criteria to adopt a child in/ from India

What does it take to adopt a child in/ from India?  This four and a half minutes video explains all that.  

Fundamental principles of adoption and the importance of knowing them...

There's a high probability for anyone to easily misinterpret the adoption regulations, 2017, of India, if they don't understand the fundamental principles of adoptions.  This short video tries to explain the three fundamental principles and the importance of knowing them. 

Understanding the difference in CARA prior to and after 2015

If you're looking to adopt a child in/ from India, you ought to understand the difference in CARA (Central Adoption Resource Authority) prior to, and after 2015.  I tried to explain it in this video.

Three ways to prevent disruption/ dissolution of adoption

If you have not heard of terminology called 'Disruption' and 'Dissolution' in the sphere of adoption, be aware that they are there in the latest adoption regulations - 2017.  As the terminology sounds, it is to do with the interruption of adoption and termination of adoption respectively.   

Is it appropriate to make a donation to an adoption agency during the home study visit?

Recently I read on a google group for adoption someone asking if it is appropriate for an adoption agency that is doing a home study report to ask for a donation and how should they proceed.  This blogpost analyses it.

I want to foster a child before adopting, is that possible?

Many prospective adoptive families have this fear of unknown and hence they think of various ways to mitigate it.  One such measure a few think of is to foster a child before adopting.  But is that possible under the law/ rules governing adoption in India.  This blogpost explores it.

I can bet that you didn't talk about this issue to your adoptive child yet...

The Hague adoption convention prescribes that all the adoptive parents undergo 'pre-adoption counselling'.  In that, it is emphasized that child ought to be informed about his/ her adoption as it is their life story.  When we start talking about adoption to a child, the process gets into the motion and the cycle goes on.

What is pre-adoption foster care?

In Juvenile & Justice Act (JJ Act), the phrase "foster care" is used in two different contexts.  Most are familiar with one (foster care) but many are not be aware of the other (pre-adoption foster care).  There are advantages and disadvantages in the pre-adoption foster care and if you're a prospective adoptive parent, you ought to be familiar with it.

Conflict of two laws (Child Marriage Act) & (Sexual Offenses Act)

Last month parliament passed a bill (waiting for the President's signature) called "Protection of Children from Sexual Offenses Act (PCSOA)" and in it it states the legal age to consent to engage in sexual activities as 18.  But this seem directly in conflict with "Prohibition of Child Marriage Act (PCMA)".  Allow me to explain:

Wanna develop slogans against Child Abuse/ Child Sexual abuse?

My last post was about how you can spread awareness against the child sexual abuse and it appears that there's lot of interest for that particular post.

You too can do this to speak out against child sexual abuse

Two weeks ago when an Indian bollywood star Aamir Khan hosted an episode on a program called "Sathyameva Jayathe" country took notice of child sexual abuse like never before.  It is the most talked about item on many TV channels.  

Can an unmarried & underage mother consent for her child?

Situation: An unmarried & underage mother (below 18) is grappling with a thought whether to keep the baby or to relinquish while the family had made a decision to relinquish.  Does the mother has any right to consent for her own child's future?

4 ways to build your child's confidence

12 year old Satyam Kumar of Bihar, India made news yesterday for something so difficult to make.  He cracked an IIT (Indian Institute of Technology) entrance exam in 2012 and got a rank of 8K plus.  

Give child killers the ultimate punishment (‘Children’s Day’ Series)

Recently I was pleasantly surprised to read the Supreme Court of India’s verdict where they seem to have redefined the definition of ‘Rarest of rare’ crimes that deserves death penalty. That got me thinking if that could also be applied to child killers??

Case in reference is a dowry death where a man and his mother were convicted by the Supreme Court of India but the irony of it not just the verdict but the commentary that was left along while passing the judgment. This is how it was commented by the presiding judges “Although bride-burning or bride-hanging cases have become common in our country, in our opinion, the expression ‘rarest of rare' does not mean that the act is uncommon, it means that the act is brutal and barbaric. Bride killing is certainly barbaric.”

Victim in the case above is a 24 year old young lady who is an adult who understands right from wrong. To an extent, may also understand how to defend herself in case of an offense against her. Just in the last two months I have read about three cases of kidnapping and/ or murder of innocent children in our state of Tamilnadu alone. Two children near Coimbatore were allegedly sexually assaulted and wee killed in cold blood.

So the obvious question to me is this: Why some people dare to commit crimes against children? Personally, I think it is because of the children’s inability to defend themselves and secondly because the perpetrators know that in our country (India), most of the time, punishment doesn’t fit the crime and they can get away get away with it. This is potentially a deadly combination that if not tackled effectively, could jeopardize the future of many children of India.

Sadly, there were literally thousands and thousands of dowry deaths in our country but why in this particular case Supreme Court had found dowry death to be a rarest of rare crime that deserves death sentence for the perpetrators? In my personal opinion, Supreme Court is setting precedence in case law which can be used in future for any brutal crime to be redefined as rarest of the rare crimes.

In conclusion, without condoning a murder, I would like to say that, if taking a life of a 24 year old adult could be a rarest of rare crimes for its brutality, taking a life of an innocent & defenseless child is brutal enough and certainly fits the Supreme Court’s definition of rarest of rare crimes. Then the perpetrators must be given death sentence.

I suggest that the government of India take comfort in the Supreme Court’s redefinition of rarest of rare crimes and include a provision in the bill (Prevention of offences against the child bill, 2009) before it is introduced in the parliament for its approval to suggest that killing a child is a rarest of rare crimes to entitle the perpetrators a death sentence.

Police zero in on couple behind child trafficking

Here is a story reported in 'Times of India' on the 19th of October where children are being kidnapped for the purposes of adoption to make money.

As we have seen in many many instances that kidnapping is the modus operandi for some to place children in adoption for financial gain and it is increasingly becoming widespread in India. there needs to be a solution to fix it. I am in support of all the efforts of the government to tackle these kinds of problem but they are woefully inadequate and sometimes the government machinery itself may be the aggressor.

I personally think that we need citizens empowerment to tackle child kidnapping/ trafficking. We need a network that connects people to help out. I have created an alert system called 'IndiaChildAlert' (something similar to 'Amber Alert' in the US but without the billboards). If you like, you can read more about IndiChildAlert at this link

If you're living in India and own a mobile phone, you can follow the steps below to join the IndiaChildAlert network.

Send an SMS by typing FOLLOW INDIACHILDALERT (don't forget to give the space between the two words) and then send the message to 53000. That's it. For this one SMS, your network might charge you according to your agreement.

You should receive a message saying that you're following IndiaChildAlert and from then on, anytime we have a missing/ lost/ trafficked child to report, we shall send a message out as an SMS which will be picked up by your mobile phone. I am assuming that for receiving SMS's you're not charged.

At anytime you do not want to be part of this network, send an SMS by typing LEAVE INDIACHILDALERT to 53000 and you're removed.

Kindly do forward this message to as many friends and families as you can to help build this network. If you do have a web site/ blog/ facebook/ twitter/ Linkedin or any other virtual networking account(s), please do post this message to encourage others to join. Larger the network, easier it is going to get in finding kidnapped children to restore them to their families.

Take a peak at what you can do for the upcoming 'Children's Day'!!

In India, November 14th is observed as the 'Children's Day' and as far as I remember as a little boy we used to participate in some fun competitions like debate and elocution etc. I personally think that 'Children's Day' is not just meant for the children but for everyone to remember our children and their issues.

Although India has come a long way, there are lot of issues out there for children that still needs attention. One issues that I seriously think needs attention is 'Child Abuse'. In 2007, Ministry of Women & Child Development study revealed that little over 60% of Indian children are subjected to abuse of some kind or the other including sexual abuse committed by the members known to them (family and relative).

So I want to do something. How about wearing a T-Shirt that conveys something against Child Abuse to people around you? I designed a T-shirt that you can make it for yourself and wear it on that day. There are T-Shirt making kits (for graphics printing) available in the market to make yourself a very fancy one or you can simply use some markers to write the words and wear it. This is such a small thing but I can assure you that you'll be conveying a very powerful message to those around you.

Below is the design of a T-Shirt. Feel free to write your own words as you like but the bottomline is to stand for something and convey it. Click on the image to enlarge it.

Heard it through the grapevine about this adoption rule change….

According to the JJ Act, once the Child Welfare Committee (CWC) declares the child free for adoption, agency can place the child in pre-adoption foster care and then initiates the adoption legalization process in the court. I heard from a source recently that this rule has been changed.

Pre-Adoption foster care refers to placing a child in the home of a prospective adoptive parents home while the finalization process is underway. This is done in the best interest of the child to reduce the stay of the child in the adoption agency as the finalization of adoption in the court could take several months. But unfortunately there are some agencies delaying the filing of papers and putting the child’s adoption status in limbo.

As per my understanding, changed rule says that the agency can only place a child in pre-adoption foster care after the papers are filed (not finalized) for legalization in the court.

Like any rule, I have no doubt in my mind that this is only been done in the best interest of the child but it does seem to have one downside and that is lengthening of stay of the child in the adoption agency. This also places higher burden on the agencies to do everything correctly by the book before they file papers in the court because failing to do so can only increase their costs by keeping the child for longer duration of time. This rule change applies to the state of Tamilnadu only.

What does JJ Act of India actually say about adopiton??

There's a lot of talk about JJ Act, 2000 (amended in 2006) being the provision for secular adoptions in India compared to the personal laws (Hindu Adoption & Maintainance Act or HAMA and Guardianship and Maintainance Act or GAWA) that governed Indian adoptions before. Unfortunately many people do not know the actual provisions of JJ Act on adoption. This post will help you understand that. JJ Act deals with adoption in Section 41 and here it is:

Section 41. Adoption:-

(1) The primary responsibility for providing care and protection to children shall be that of his family.

(2) Adoption shall be resorted to for the rehabilitation of the children who are orphan, abandoned, or surrendered, through such mechanism as may be prescribed.

(3) In keeping with the provisions of the various guidelines for adoption issued from time to time, by the state government, or the central adoption resource agency, notified by the central government, children may be given in adoption by a court after satisfying itself regarding the investigations having been carried out as or required for giving such children in adoption.

(4) The state government shall recognize one or more of its institutions or voluntary organization in each district as specialized adoption agencies in such manner as may be prescribed for the placement of orphan, abandoned, or surrendered children for adoption in accordance with the guidelines notified under sub section (3):

Provided that the children’s homes and the institutions run by the state governments or a voluntary organization for children in need of care and protection, who are orphan, abandoned, or surrendered, shall ensure that these children are declared free for adoption by the committee and all such cases shall be referred to the adotption agency in that district for placement of such children in adoption in accordance with guidelines notified under sub section (3).

(5) No child shall be offered for adoption:-

a. Until two members of the committee declare the child legally free for placement in the case of abandoned children,
b. Till the two months period for reconsideration by the parent is over in the case of surrendered children,
c. Without his consent in the case of a child who can understand and express his consent.

(6) The court may allow a child to be given in adotption –

a. To a person irrespective of a marital status or ;
b. To parents to adopt a child of same sex irrespective of the number of living biological sons or daughters;
c. To childless couples.

Adoption Workshop in Chennai

Dear Aspiring Adoptive Parent

We are pleased to inform that during this year’s Adoption Awareness Week, we shall be conducting a one-day workshop for Aspiring parents wanting to adopt a child.

During this hands-on workshop you would fill-in your Adoption Preparation Manual and take it with you. The adoption aspects that are covered shall include:

Adoption Stages (Indecisive, Decisive, Waiting)
Adopter’s Choice-Resource Matrix
Adopter’s Psychological Pregnancy
Adopter’s Coping Patterns+ Measuring Spousal relationship
Understanding Child Temperaments
Involving Extended Family Members
The 7 core issues in Adoption
Positive Adoption Language
Transition to Adoptive Parenthood

Dr.Hoksbergen from Holland, who is an adoption expert and the author of many books such as 'Adopting a Child' shall discuss on Adoptiive Parenthood

Date: Sunday 14NOVTime: 0900hrs Registration,
Workshop: from 09:30 to 16:30hrs
Venue: Relief Foundation Resource Centre, 7/9, Sriram Nagar Main Road, Thiruvanmiyur, Chennai 600041
Contact: Vidya Shankar 94444 49644
Investment: Rs750 per couple or Rs500 per individual if paid before before 31Oct.Rs1000 per couple or Rs600 per individual if paid between 01to14Nov.

Kindly mail your confirmation (indicating your expectations from theworkshop) and send your cheque payable at Chennai to the address mentioned above.We would be grateful if you could forward this mail to whoever you fee lmight benefit from this workshop conducted only twice a year.

This invitation is on behalf of SuDatta Adoption Support Group and Relief Foundation.

April – “Child Abuse Prevention Month”

On April 1st, 2010 President of the US signed a proclamation declaring the month of April as “National Child Abuse Prevention Month” (Click here to see the proclamation). So this brings up a question “What is child abuse” to begin with?

There are different versions of definitions but as a whole they all convey the same message. One definition says that physically harming a child not by accident to saying that any violation of articles of UNCRC (United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child).

All in all every definition conveys the same message that is child is been abused to harm him/ her physically and/ or psychologically and/ or emotionally.
In India, Child Abuse is a huge problem. In 2007, government of India had released the finding of a study that said more than 60% of our children below the age of 14 are subjected to abuse of one kind or the other (including sexual abuse committed by a person known to the child). If the government is saying that, then the reality must be worse than what is reported.

Research shows that the parents that are empowered with required information and skills to protect their children do better than those that do not. But the challenge in India is how do we empower families that are not literate adequately to read or to understand the subtle messages conveyed through the media?

There’s no other way to empowering than through education but that education has to be informally delivered in informal settings (such as Self Help Groups, Vegetable Markets and Barber shops etc). On the other hand empowerment has to be done with the children and their resiliency has to be improved to face the face the challenges head on. Child ought to be taught about their rights and responsibilities to identify the violators.

Apart from the parents and children, community as a whole need to be made aware of the problem at hand and enable them to play a catalytic role. For example, when someone encounters an instance of child abuse, they can bring it to the notice of appropriate authorities.

Child abuse is a menace that needs immediate attention lest we might have a generation of citizens that may be living with hidden trauma that is difficult to treat and has enormous economic cost to the nation as a whole.