I can bet that you didn't talk about this issue to your adoptive child yet...

The Hague adoption convention prescribes that all the adoptive parents undergo 'pre-adoption counselling'.  In that, it is emphasized that child ought to be informed about his/ her adoption as it is their life story.  When we start talking about adoption to a child, the process gets into the motion and the cycle goes on.

Many comply with that expectation of talking to the adoptive children and equal if not more number of families also don't comply with it for various reasons only known to them.  Those who do comply, talk about all kinds of issues surrounding adoption but recently I came across an issue that I never opened up with my children and this blogspot is all about that.

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Did you ever get to talk to your child(ren) about how much money it costed you to adopt him/ her?  Before you could say YES/ NO, you might be ready to give million reasons to justify your actions.  Let me share my own experience of what happened when I shared this issue with my children.

They asked me something that I always knew that it might happen but I was not prepared when they did ask me.  They asked me "Did you buy us"?  It hit me hard.  I tried to comprehend their feeling by putting myself in their shoes.  How would I feel if I have a price tag on my forehead.  Every avenue that I tried to think of escaping to, didn't help.

If my family could have such an open communication channel and still have my children feel the way they do, I was wondering what if the children come to know about the costs not from their own parents but through some other source?  In this age of information super-highway, is it that difficult?  If you have not done it already, it may be in your child's best interest to let them know in some form or fashion about this uncomfortable truth sooner than later.      

My girls also said that they understood the logic but just didn't feel that it is the right approach.  That's when it got me thinking how can this (adoption expenses) be avoided?  Well...I'll keep that for another blogpost I guess.  But for now, I want to hear your thoughts.  What do you think?  Write in the comments section below.  Don't forget to join for our blogfeed by signing up for our newsletter on the top left corner of this blog.