Do you know this?

There are approximately 18000 parents registered with CARA, while the number of children in the Government's adoption pool is less 1800.

Friday, November 02, 2007

What is open adoption?

This following information (answer to a question "What is open adoption) was printed on NRI-Child initially and reprinted here with permission from the author.

with permission from The lifelong process for everyone in an open adoption is soo much easier. Open does not mean continued contact or ever meeting in person. It just 'open' with some facts shared at the time of birth. We have two adopted daughters, both Indian, our older daughter via a closed adoption from India and the younger daughter via an open adoption in the US. The immense benefits are very tangible in our lives.

Our older one had a series of skin allergies and we were sure to ask those allergy type questions to the birthmother for our younger. We wish, oh how we wish we had even an intermediary to get the basic medical concern questions asked for our older. I am sure if a birthmother knew their child would suffer even a day less - they would be happy to provide that information in a private manner.

While I always made it a point to speak about any birthmom with respect, I did not truly empathize with their journey until I met my baby's birthmom. Even if our oldest daughter birthmother did not have access to email, or was in a situation that did not permit contact, I believe she would come to a deeper peace knowing what a loving home our daughter is growing up in.

I know that our youngest daughter's birthmom has told us many times that her journey through this experience has been much easier having chosen us. I also believe for children in coming to terms with their adoptive stories just know a few facts surrounding their birth. I feel my youngest daughter will feel empowered with the truth. I also feel guilt, sadness and frustration that I cannot do that for my oldest.

Interestingly, our older one has connected with the birthmother of her sister (they met at the hospital) and remembers her as their tummy mommy who loves them so much.

If there is ever a forum to present this to CARA, I would be happy to contribute my experiences.

Do you think open adoption will work in India? If it doesn't, what problems do you foresee? Write in the comments section.

1 comment:

Lynn said...

I doubt if Open adoption will work in India. My family was instrumental in caring for an unwed mother, who relinquished her child. She was so distressed, that she did not even want to know what baby she had delivered. It took much persuasion to get her to breastfeed her child for a month. She never even once asked what will happen to her child. He, it was a Boy, was given for adoption.
Children who are available for adoption are either relinquished by birth mother, or are found abandoned. Open adoption is possible when the child is relinquished. However, in India children relinquished are a much lesser number compared to the abandoned ones. The children relinquished are usually the born to women who are married but have some apparent birth/ congenital anomalies, or these are girl child. The abandoned ones are born to unwed mothers, or again girl child.