I talk to my child all the time about adoption but I don’t use the word ‘Adoption’. My family uses lot of events such as visiting the orphanage to help our child to understand her past. Are we doing it correctly?
Before you talk to your child anymore about adoption, you need to get some self-confidence built in yourself to deal with this issue. I see that you have good intentions but you may not be going the whole distance.
Your strategy is like telling a child “Milk is good” but not telling him the whole truth about where the milk comes from and why it is good for our health. Eventually there’s a danger for a child in this scenario to believe that milk is manufactured at the back of the grocery store or someone telling him the whole truth before which time he/ she may have made few mistakes about milk and got embarrassed.
Now use the above analogy and think about adoption. If you’re not comfortable in using the word ‘adoption’ with your child, take it from me, someone will. By then your child’s understanding of adoption could be totally different from what you wanted him/ her to develop into and could have conflict in perception.
First and foremost, address the reasons for not using the word ‘adoption’. It could be fear or thinking that the child is too young to understand it. In my personal opinion, younger the child, easier it is to talk about it but if it is fear you need to address it first.
Ruby
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