5 Do's of adoption

Part # 1

Since the journey of adoption can be tedious and lengthy. Every prospective adoptive parent(s) should know what to do to make this process not to influence him or her negatively. I have identified five of them but there could be more. So if you have something that you would like to add, please feel free to add them in the comments so that others may benefit. As this article could be lengthy, I thought to add one a day. Here we go:

Do a legal adoption: For various reasons (cost of adoption, and to keep the fact of adoption within the family, etc) some intentionally and unintentionally chooses to do an illegal adoption. Here it is worth considering what is legal adoption and what is not. Legal adoption is where you have adopted a child from a government recognized adoption agency in an established process. After completing your adoption, a legal court has issued a document declaring you as legal parent to the child. Anything short of this could be considered as not as legal adoption.

Allow me to share an experience of a couple that I heard of, of what happened for not doing a legal adoption. They were infertile and one day a nearby vegetable vendor asked them if they would like to adopt a child. After they said yes, he brought a baby to them and said that the biological parents are unable to care for the child and if the couple could help them (bio parents) by paying some money. In ignorance and naivety, gave the money to the vegetable vendor and took the child in. Everything was going on well till one day the vegetable vendor showed up again at the couple’s door and asked for more money. When they couldn’t, he threatened them that he would report to the police. Alarmed couple themselves took the child to the police and reported the whole incidence. Police had no other choice but to take the custody of the child and placed her in adoption agency. Unfortunately the adoptive mother and the child at the adoption agency became so sick, that on compassionate grounds government reunited the child with the family and allowed them to do a legal adoption.

Not doing a legal adoption could also render you powerless in terms of being open about adoption with your child. For being open, you’re always afraid of someone coming forward to accuse you of something you may not have done consciously.

Without a legal document, you cannot obtain a birth certificate, which could create lot of problems later on such as admission to school, applying for a passport and if you have any biological children, could deny the adoptive child any part of inheritance.

Feel free to add your thoughts in the comments sections. Tomorrow this section will continue

RN