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Sunday, July 01, 2007

My child's incredible story (# 1)


Our daughter

By Ganga Gopalkrishnan
You were conceived many moons ago in our hearts. You had the face, shape and sweetness of love, but the picture was yet to come clear…the long arduous journey had a destination and the end of the pathway you were waiting to embrace us to your little life. Our daughter Anushka, we love you so much. It feels so nice to call you “our daughter”.

The home stretch began with a call from the social worker on the 17th of March just with your name, Yamuna. You have a name in our hearts now. It sounds so magical because I am Ganga and you are Yamuna, my tributary….Wow, it is so much meant to be….Papa, big brother Akhil and me were dancing with joy that night. More waiting for a picture. Before your first birthday (March 28th), we got a small picture of yours. Another piece of puzzle falls in place. Now we can dream about you, we thought so much about you on your birthday and wanted to be with you.
Finally by mid September, all the papers were cleared and I was cleared for travel.

I boarded the plane on October 4th and was there in Kochi on October 6th. After a quick shower, we were to make that magical journey, I was dreaming about you as Princess Cinderella, the prince charming was not coming, but mommy is. We had a battalion of people to welcome you home. Grandma, grandpa, uncles, aunt and your cousins were all ready to meet and greet you.

When we reached the nursery, a sense of silence was felt in our van, we were all praying for a wonderful welcome home for our daughter. Everyone was thinking about your first reaction, whether it will be a smile, a cry, a confused look, a breakdown…. When I reached the office, the caregivers were all busy preparing your papers to be handed over to me. I felt so silly thinking that how can you equate your love, relations and emotions through some papers. Well it is part of our life. After the initial paperwork, they asked me whether I was ready to see you.

They bathed and got you dressed in traditional dress and brought you to the office. You looked so elegant and graceful. You raised your face and looked at me and I saw your eyes sparkling. I wanted to come face to face with you and ask for your permission before I took you away from your first home, your comfort. So I asked the caregiver to have you stand. She made you stand near the pillar. I could see your expressions changing; you felt something is not quite the same. I raised my index finger towards you. You grabbed it immediately. I was amazed by the confidence and trust you kept on me when you grabbed my finger without any hesitation; I saw the grace and feminine shyness in your eyes. Wow, I felt that the name we kept for you, Anushka (graceful) is so appropriate. You carried your self with so much dignity despite being the center of attraction and seeing mommy’s tears of joy all over. I took you aside for a minute and laid you on my heart and I was surprised by the calmness you had in your heart and I heard both of our hearts beating synchronously. I felt everything was right. My tiredness and worries disappeared in the earthly paradise you gave me as a mother.

It was time for the prayer and handing over ceremony. You did not even shed a drop of tear and was watching the surroundings so carefully. You felt weird when everyone started giving you good-bye kiss. I could see a spark of fear going through your eyes. I tried holding you close to my heart so that the rhythms will make you comfortable.

On the way home, you were looking at everyone in the van and were observing what everyone was doing. Your cousins were trying to play with you, but you felt discomfort and were leaning more and more towards me. After the dusk, you started getting scared and you started throwing up. I thought it to be a sign of indigestion. How did I know that our little girl who was so brave in embracing a new mommy was scared of the dark?

It’s been so much pleasure knowing you as a person and a daughter. Our life time journey just began…..

1 comment:

Kakuli said...

Felt like I was with you in that journey..my heart goes out for the kid. God bless.